Berserk Stupid theories

Post by **psi29a** » Fri Apr 08, 2005 4:35 pm

Time to steer this behemoth back on track. Remember all, this is the stupid theory thread. Mean... get it ALL out. If you have pages of shit you want to post, here is the place. If you have something funny or sick about berserk... post it here.

Get it out of your system, that way we can discuss other stuff in the forum without hearing "what if", "But [insert name here] can do this or the other". Remember, if you want to prove something or pass along a point... be sure to provide evidence and Volume/Chapter/Page numbers.

*ahem*
Stupid Theory 1: The god-hand and all the super-natural elements are actually a personification of Guts' will and imagination.

Stupid Theory 2: Caska will have Skull Daddy's man-babies.

Post by **Necromancer** » Fri Apr 08, 2005 5:25 pm

The second one really made me laugh.

Then:
What if the Elvenking is perverted like all the other kings in Berserk and he wants a female elf (not looking at anybody in Guts group) to give him some service (don't know if these tiny elves even do this stuff) before he helps them.

Post by **dos.azn** » Fri Apr 08, 2005 5:52 pm

stupid theory: puck is a transvestite!

Post by **DarkenRahlX** » Fri Apr 08, 2005 7:51 pm

Would people view Guts in the same way if he used a regular broad sword instead of a claymore on steriods?

Post by **Tempest** » Fri Apr 08, 2005 8:21 pm

DarkenRahlX wrote:Would people view Guts in the same way if he used a regular broad sword instead of a claymore on steriods?

Absolutely not. Real swords are for pansies(Except for Serpico, his Wind Sword is too pimp). Only a real man can handle the Dragon Slayer.

Post by **Necromancer** » Fri Apr 08, 2005 8:33 pm

Yeah the Dragonslayer is awesome. Everyone who saw Guts swinging that sword got Scared and excited. And they all wondered who the hell can swing such a piece of iron at this speed.

Post by **Tempest** » Fri Apr 08, 2005 8:39 pm

So, not to ruin the thread with logic, my crazy ass Bersek Theory:

1000 years ago, the evil Emporer Gaiseric was brought down by 4-5 Angels. My theory is that Griffith will get to be the new "Emporer" of Midland and will be brought down by 4-4 "Angels" namley Gutts, Casca, SK, Scheirke and or some other person we may or may not have met.

Wait that one is kinda logical, shit......uh..........Farnese is a vampire! There we go.....

Post by **Necromancer** » Fri Apr 08, 2005 10:00 pm

A vampire-pyromaniac some new kind of personified spontaneous ignition?

Post by **Tempest** » Fri Apr 08, 2005 10:10 pm

Uh...yeah...exactly!

Post by **Buzkashi** » Sat Apr 09, 2005 12:26 am

Tempest wrote:
DarkenRahlX wrote:Would people view Guts in the same way if he used a regular broad sword instead of a claymore on steriods?
Absolutely not. Real swords are for pansies(Except for Serpico, his Wind Sword is too pimp). Only a real man can handle the Dragon Slayer.

No im afraid you are mistaken my good man. Serpico is a pansie. His sword is gay and so is his cape. End of story.

Post by **Tempest** » Sat Apr 09, 2005 12:30 am

Buzkashi wrote:
Tempest wrote:
DarkenRahlX wrote:Would people view Guts in the same way if he used a regular broad sword instead of a claymore on steriods?
Absolutely not. Real swords are for pansies(Except for Serpico, his Wind Sword is too pimp). Only a real man can handle the Dragon Slayer.
No im afraid you are mistaken my good sword. Serpico is a pansie. His sword is gay and so is his cape. End of story.

Can I buy some pot from you? Serpico is a pimp. He's an awesome fighter, he is a brilliant tactician and went toe-to-toe with Gutts, and it came out as a draw. And that was before he got his wind sword. You wish you had a sword and a cape as cool as his. At least I do. Gutts is the shizzle, but Serpico is a close second for rizzle.

Post by **Southpaw** » Sat Apr 09, 2005 12:33 am

It doesn't matter how well he fights. He still looks like a fruitcake.

Post by **Buzkashi** » Sat Apr 09, 2005 12:33 am

He couldnt beat guts. The only reason it seemed like that that one time was because guts was on the edge of a cliff and couldnt draw his sword (which i like to call the "fuckyoshitupfast " slayer)

Post by **Southpaw** » Sat Apr 09, 2005 12:37 am

I think that was tempest's point. Serpico deliberately chose to fight gutts on the cliff for that reason.

Post by **Buzkashi** » Sat Apr 09, 2005 12:38 am

Serpico is what i like to call. A faggmobitch

He justs needs to swan dive off of a 4 story building.

Post by **Southpaw** » Sat Apr 09, 2005 12:39 am

That may well be. I certainly think he is fruity, but that doesn't stop him from being an excellent fighter.

Post by **Tempest** » Sat Apr 09, 2005 12:45 am

Exactly. Why did he fight Gutts on a a cliff? Well, to quote "The Boondock Saints": "Why? 'Cause he's fuckin' smaart!" He knew fighting Gutts with a large number in an open place was suicide. He used as many advantages as he could get. Gutts even said, he is a master tactician, and if Gutts hadn't been able to grab his sword and break it with his fake arm, he was done for.

And...the gay joke....well.....that just wasn't nice.

I don't put just anybody as my avatar.

And I would like t osee any of you hold your own against a creature of myth. Trolls, Kelpies, it don't matter. Serpico will take 'em down.

Post by **Southpaw** » Sat Apr 09, 2005 12:49 am

Until you pointed it out I didn't know he was your avatar. However that still does not stop him form looky fruitay. Creatures of myth are easy. I got enough firepower in my closet to own them all day long.

Post by **Buzkashi** » Sat Apr 09, 2005 12:52 am

I dont care that hes smart, cause he is. Hes still a faggmobitch

Post by **Tempest** » Sat Apr 09, 2005 12:58 am

Aw forget it. Why am I discussing this with a person who has "faggmobitch" in their vocabulary again? Serpico=Cooler than everyone but Gutts. Period.

Post by **Eldo** » Sat Apr 09, 2005 1:03 am

...and, Guts = cooler than faggmobitch

I don't get why people don't like Serpico. He's pretty damn cool. He's got the acknowledge of Guts as a fighter and is invaluable to the party.

Post by **Buzkashi** » Sat Apr 09, 2005 1:03 am

*slaps head* YOU think that the faggmobitch is cooler than SK, Silat and the Neo Band of the Hawks. Good god man you need help.

Post by **Tempest** » Sat Apr 09, 2005 1:16 am

Thanks Eldo...I think.

Buzkashi wrote:*slaps head* YOU think that the faggmobitch is cooler than SK, Silat and the Neo Band of the Hawks. Good god man you need help.

I like Serpico better than SK, mainly because SK doesn't have much character that we can see, maybe if his character is developed more. For now he's just a skull-headed hard ass who used to wear the Berserk armor whose motives remain unknown.

Silat=Fool. DOn't know how much more I can elaborate on that.

Neo Band of the Hawk - Meh. They're cheating, they have apostle powers and everyone else (Except the Kushan Emporer) doesn't. They are not naturally that strong, they had their power given to them. I do think Locas and Irving are pretty cool, but like I said, they don't have real skill, and if they do, then it is overshadowed by their apostle power.

So I personally like some characters better than others, oh well, it's my perogative. Next thing you know you'll be calling me "Teh Gayzor" and making fun of my mom (Who is a SAINT). You're entitled to your opinions, I am to mine. Remember, the world don't move to the beat of one drum, what might be right to you, may not be right for some. You take the good, you take the bad, and when you take them both you have...my opening statement, er, my point.

Post by **LordMune** » Sat Apr 09, 2005 1:36 am

I have a theory I actually spent two seconds thinking about until I realized what I was doing...

After the final encounter with Griffith, Gatts falls through a time hole and becomes the Skull Knight in the pre-Golden Age era. Shierke later falls through a different time hole, ending up somewhere relatively close by, time-wise. They meet again after a number of years, and Shierke renames herself Flora, for consistency.

Post by **DarkenRahlX** » Sat Apr 09, 2005 3:35 am

What if Serpico was the main character of Berserk and Guts was a co-star? Would you still appreciate the manga as much?

Evil Genius

Berserk Stupid theories

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