your atypical berserk thread about newbies

[psi29a]

There as been an onslaught of new users lately that have braved their first post. While we have Guidelines and we have a FAQ, we don't have a handbook/guide for the newish folk that have found us here.

Perhaps inside this new tomb of wisdom should hold such gems as: "How to spot a newbie in this forum. How to be new and not a newbie. The differences between the two. How to not get your butt plugged by veterans."

The FAQ doesn't answer this questions, perhaps it doesn't have to since these are more forum wide issues than just berserk.

Anywho, discuss what you guys think and feel free to contribute; new, newbie, and veterans alike.

Note: for those who lack the capacity to find humour in odd places, 'teh' was used intentionally to lure the unsuspecting newbies into what they think is a 'friendly' conversation.

[Buzkashi]

Yea I'm happy theres a lot of new users. But they need to be whiped into shape.

[Eldo]

There's so areas that should be left untouched Psi...it's too many to name. Don't start threads that states the obvious I guess. Like, 'how did Guts get branded' and other really stupid things that can easily be solved by deduction or re-reading the volumes.

[psi29a]

Buz: seriously, if you have to ask, do so via PM.

DarkenRahlX: sig is too big, trim it please.

To all: read the forum guidelines, ease up on the swearing (unless you are a moderator putting the hammer down).

Please, if you don't have anything productive to type, then don't post.

On that note... *ploink* the thread has been sanitized.

What I'm asking is: In everyone's opinion, how best to handle new comers to the board. What can be done to minimize the amount of n00bery. Should there be a sticky at the top of the forums that says: "You must read this before you post, or else..."? or "How to NOT be a newbie in the Berserk forums."

Or we can just forget this whole silly exercise and beat people with a stick to remove the demons of stupidity?

[Arresty]

We are being to nice to the stupid ones. We need to flame them, so people will be like, oh maybe its a bad idea to start a new thread about something stupid. Be nicer to them when the post in a thread and harsh when they do a stupid thread like "How did Guts get branded". Then again, I am generally a nice guy, and woudl leave the flaming to others, but I know a few of you guys can do it.

Also this could be a bad idea. Depends on how you look at it.

[Eldo]

Or we can just forget this whole silly exercise and beat people with a stick to remove the demons of stupidity?

That doesn't sound like a bad idea...

But if I was to flame someone (hint, hint) one of the aspects are: The behaviour in which they try to instill some stupid humour in their first posts, which makes them look like a dumbarse. But really, saying things that sound like a refugee from the stupid theories thread would not gain you extra points around us. If you want to act like an ass, do it in the Stupid Theories thread (unless, of course, you're me ). First posts usually determines who the noob is around here.

I generally think that there's too many noobish acts to name. You can usually spot one...but I'm not too sure even if this is put up, the newbies will submit to this guide anyway.

[Arresty]

Yeah, some noob stuff definately falls in the gray area category. What is good at one forum may be considered noobish here. I like high standards though, so if it is at all stupid, they should burn.

Certain threads are an exception, ie stupid theories, or even Omake, which we all love so much. Those you can let loose a little, but that is why they are there. If you keep it there the forum stays clean. But no matter how many threads get locked or how many stickies we make saying Newbies read here first, and the newbies will read there first, the noobs won't. Its like the Chris Rock bit called Niggers VS Black People. They are different, and noobs give newbies a bad name.

[Eldo]

Yeah, that's a good point Arresty. What I hope is the stupid theory or omake threads don't become a gathering point for noob central. It's just because you can't flame anyone on the stupid theory thread despite their noobish and stupid acts because, damn them, they are on topic!

[Arresty]

Yeah, that's a good point Arresty. What I hope is the stupid theory or omake threads don't become a gathering point for noob central. It's just because you can't flame anyone on the stupid theory thread despite their noobish and stupid acts because, damn them, they are on topic!

Yeah that is true. But Omake I think flaming is OK. You can make an omake flaming the noob, wait you have already done similar a few times. I doubt omake would be a good gathering place for them though, since it is more specific, but stupid theory is pretty much open territory. Omake there is still some need to contribute something useful, I would really hate it if it got flooded by shitty omake though. That would be bad, and degrade the thread so much. As for stupid theories, I would much rather have it get flooded with noobs, then any other thread, or them posting new threads that have obvious answers, already been discussed, or just blatantly stupid as <Censored>. Oh Yeah I can censor. Awesome.

[Southpaw]

Well if they don't take the time to read the n00b stickie's or follow the precedent's of other people then just control them with social pressure. If they get flamed for their idiotic new threads consistently every time they do it hopefully they will get the idea into their heads to stop. Just apply some common sense, tell them how they screwed up the first time they do it and if they repeat burn them.

@Eldo Your right the n00bs probably won't abide by stickied rules, but I bet that the veteran posters can apply significant pressure to ensure that a suitably high standard is maintained. Be nice the first time vs n00bish acts, drop the hammer on second offense. Just make sure they know why they are getting flamed or they might repeat the behavior anyway.

[Arresty]

Just make sure they know why they are getting flamed or they might repeat the behavior anyway.

Yeah that is key, flame but inform. Preferably have the inform and flame together, or inform then flame. We want them to stick around long enough to be informed before we make them cry for thier mommy.

Only problem with the rest of your stuff Southpaw, is that the problem is alot of these guys are first time posters, and only one time posters. So even if we get it in there head teh first time without flaming then they will never come back anyways to post again. If that is the case then I would say open the fire gates and let the flaming begin. That way anyone who is just lurking in the background deciding whether or not to post the stupid post, reads that post he goes, man that had to hurt, maybe I shoudl hold back a bit or maybe find a better location for my uber stupid post.

[Eldo]

There really isn't any one time posters in the Berserk forums. Other forums, yes, but rarely in the Berserk forum anymore. Most of those one time posters usually ask how to operate mIRC, and when is Manga X chapter X coming out. But the truth is, those who had been flamed never come back. It's like they think we'll identify them for future flaming or something. I have been quite lenient on most noobs lately, there are alot of opportunities where I could have smite them harder instead of giving a standard response of 'WTF' or answering their dumb, ol', question.

[Southpaw]

Well if you never get proper etiquette in their heads and they stick around you still have a problem. If they post once and never return then you have wasted one post and a little bit of your time. You just got to decide if you want to make useful members of the n00bs or just flame till they all leave and never return. It really all just depends on what you want. If you like things how they are and just don't want to see n00bish posts just burn them till they go away.

So it's A) I would like to see the community grow and don't mind taking the time to inform them once and see if they improve.

or B) Burn them all! Stupid noobs should learn how google works!

Whichever works for you

[Arresty]

I have been nice myself. But I am always nice. Well maybe not always, but I think the forum could still have many new users. I like newbies, just not noobs. And even the worst of noobs can turnaround and get better. Well maybe not the worst of them, but maybe some of them who aren't as bad. Some of the stupid newbie posts, are mainly stupid to us bcause it was some side topic in all of the 10+ page threads so we have all seen it a million times, but just looking quickly through yo uwoulnd't notice it, but still sucks to read the same opinions again. Those guys generally recover, and don't deserve a big flaming, so we don't scare them off. They can often times become good normal decent members later on. But then thier are the threads that are started with teh exact same friggin name, or are just blatantly stupid. Those guys, are not the same. They deserve a good flaming, and unless they watch/read and UNDERSTAND all the forum rulss/videos/other noob to newbie training things they will never become productive.

Edit: Read last Southpaw post later. Took too long to write the above. In response to that, noobs are bad newbies are good. You choudl have an extra option. I like to see new members and watch the forum grow, as most of us probably do, but noobs are useless. Difference between the two.

[DarkenRahlX]

Well so far I don't think you guys are so bad. >< You haven't really flamed me, I've made a couple of mistakes, but I hope to be buddies with some of you guys later on.

[Arresty]

In general I have not seen any major flaming. The biggest repeat offender noob was probably caktus, and he never got flamed really. He got alot of informing, that apparently did not sink in, because after taking a long break he came back and started right back up the same as before, unchanged. But atleast he got a few decent threads going for a while, but when you start as many as he did you will eventually get something that catches on.

[Southpaw]

@DarkenRahlX Man I far more newb status than you. If they haven't flamed you I'd guess you were good to go.

@Arresty Yeah, I guess that says things rather nicely. I was amazed at the response time on that post. I wish I could think and type as coherently as you in that amount of time.

[Eldo]

Well, RahlX, the mistakes you made so far aren't noobish ones, just newbie ones. There's a distinct difference .

I have tried being 'nice'. It's not really worth the hype. I would give a decent flaming to noobs if the time calls for it, but I won't make attempts to make their time here a living hell. But if they persist with their acts, then the gloves are off. Most of us usually clarify what they've done wrong, so there's no problems there.

[Arresty]

Yeah I am still a newbie. Well maybe not that new. Plus everyone makes mistakes even the veterans, which I still don't consider myself. Not sure why, one of the higher post counts. Probably since i was not around in the DP days. I consider them veterans. But we all make stupid mistakes. Especially in the wee hours of the morning, or afternoon, depending on your sleep schedule.

[Eldo]

Well, Arresty, you haven't missed much. The DP days were rougher then, that's all I'll say. I considered myself a newbie even after I made the move to Mindwerks. You're a veteran in this board now, so I wouldn't worry about the past.

A classic example of what not to post:

"LOLZ, dont u think that gutsu should kill griffith istead of travellin to elfheml to cure damn ol caska? cuz she is teh bitch and gutsu should totally dump hr LOLZ i would chose to kill griffith instead. i mean they should get more allies in the party like that apostel guy and the other guy with the hat. n i know gutsu will use the behelit cuz he is soooooo weak lately n we all know that the behelit only let weak ppl use it lolz!!!! puck is so cute i think i should marry him but i don't like short people and i don't know what sex he is and i don't like men"

Sometimes some people from areas other than US and UK can sneak past the language barrier undetected. But please do make an effort to use proper English. English is my second language too, and you see that I have made the effort to check my spelling and ensure some of the grammar is correct. Try to type in full as well, the admins and mods hate the 'r's and 'n's. The only exceptions I see is Dos Azn, because he's asian, he's pretty damn cool, and he's a mod .

The contents and information provided in this post are dreadful. You do this and I guarantee you that we will piss and throw your rotting carcass around.

Another example of what not to post in response to a flame:

"Fuk u guys i hate u n go to hell!!!!! I H8 YOU!! u no respetc new ppl and you mean n i think u guys r mean why lock my thread n ur admin n modz r all punkass sluts who sux off a horse!!! FUK YOU!! FUK YOU!! FUK YOU!!!!!!!!! GO TO HELLZ!!!"

This is just mindless name calling. If you don't like the flame, respond with integrity and show that you are not the dumbarse that they prove you to be. Don't justify the flamers' arguments and points by responding like a dumbshit. If you notice a flame, apologise and ask what you did wrong, and there'll be plenty of answers.

Wow, it took me a long time to come up with the fake posts. Whew.

[Sahlen]

You should make an Omake about this >.<

[Arresty]

Wow, it took me a long time to come up with the fake posts. Whew.

Found it hard to dumb yourself down for them eh. Good examples though.

Also try to stay away from using L337. If you don't know what I mean then it doesn't apply to you.

Use a subject that actually applies to what you are posting when creating a new thread. And in your post make sure to be clear about what the thread is abuot. Clarify your question or your opinion if it is a thread to start a discussion.

Also, though said in every single rule thing we have you can never say it enough cause noone ever catches it, for you first post don't create a thread.

[Gaiseric]

I dont think a sticky or a FAQ will work. I think most noobs come in and go straight for the newest chapter or start asking questions. I know I never check the FAQ threads, but I dont think anyone called me a noob when I first started posting.

So, I say flame the hell out of them. If they cant take it or learn from their mistake, then good riddance.

[BigSassy]

Constructive flaming of newbies is a good thing and should continue (in my opinion). The quality of conversations in this forum are better than most fan forums, and I'd hate to see it go down from newbies filling the forum with junk. So far it hasn't been bad at all, and constructive flaming will keep it that way.

By the way, I know my posts are low but I've been lurking here for close to a year now (DP and Mindweks). I never comment, but reading the forums help takes the edge off of the wait for new chapters

[Buzkashi]

well you really should post more then.