Berserk Stupid theories

Post by **Skullkracker** » Thu Dec 21, 2006 11:39 am

pardon me for asking, but aren't you Felony's second account by any chance?

Post by **MrFelony** » Thu Dec 21, 2006 3:10 pm

No, I can at least speak and write english well enough. I think he is just going off of the stupid theory of mine. I give it a 1% chance of ever happening. I just admit that there are a lot of different paths that miura can lead the manga if he feals creative

.

ps: and that hurts skully, really deep

lol

Post by **Skullkracker** » Thu Dec 21, 2006 4:03 pm

sorry dude, my intention was to hurt him

no offence I hope

Post by **Sortep** » Thu Dec 21, 2006 11:12 pm

omake done
http://www.evil-genius.us/forums/viewto ... 2051#92051

Post by **Istvan** » Fri Dec 22, 2006 4:29 am

Ok, that was cute. Good job, Sortep, I'm impressed.

Post by **white_rose** » Sat Jan 20, 2007 5:18 pm

O.K. Since this is the stupid crap thread, I figured that this would be the best place to drop my bomb...

It is completely irrelevant to anything and everything, but....
I need to settle this debate.

If there was a live action movie, these are the actors that I would like to see play the main characters -

Guts - Till Lindemann, lead singer for Rammstein (also need a younger equivalent for younger Guts)

Caska - Padma Lakshmi ( also need Younger equivalent for younger Caska) OR Michelle Rodriguez (she also has the right attitude) OR Halle Berry

Griffith - Vincent Cassel ( also need Younger equivalent for younger Griffith)

Skull Knight - Willem Dafoe - I mean, come on... It's Willem Dafoe

Just some to start with...

Post by **Skullkracker** » Sat Jan 20, 2007 10:41 pm

white_rose wrote:Skull Knight - Willem Dafoe - I mean, come on... It's Willem Dafoe

well...khm...not that it matters

Post by **EnglishJim** » Tue Jan 23, 2007 10:30 am

Stupid theory time. One day, Irvine (the blind archer) was out hunting when he was mauled and sexually molested by a bear. As he lay there half-dead he called the God Hand and decided he wanted his ruined body no longer. He sacrificed that and became the ultimate weapon so he could have his revenge. Thus, the blind man is actually a puppet to the demonic longbow, which is the true apostle.

Post by **Istvan** » Tue Jan 23, 2007 11:48 pm

I don't think he could have sacrificed his own body like that. Say rather, he fell in love with the bear (after it sexually molested him the first time), but one day their love was so passionate that the bear accidently mortally wounded him, and when he called the God's Hand, he sacrificed the bear, his one, true love. That's also why he thinks of himself as a wild animal.

Post by **Devil_Dante** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 9:41 am

those theories arent stupid, they are lame, ok here is one:

Zodd is fond of guts, not because he is a good swordsman, but because he is his father!

Post by **MrFelony** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 4:00 pm

your's makes sense

this one doesn't

MrFelony wrote:actually you have it wrong. Guts is Slan and SK's son while Griffith is Void's and Gaiseric's daughter. and that little child on the beach isnt Casca and Guts' son. it is actually Guts and Griffith's son. you see Casca was made infetile from being raped by all those demons previous to Femto raping her, thus aborting Guts and her child. however, there was some of Guts' sperm remaining in her system...hey they were just reunited shortly before...

But back to my theory (if you cant already see where this is going). the aborted baby of Guts and Casca was still trapped in the womb however. but when Femto was raping Casca, she (femto) just happened to have a reversible vagina (sort of like those reversible jackets if anyone knows what im talking about), and when he was raping her, she (femto) inserted her eggs. these eggs then got together with guts sperm and battled it out like Guts and Griffith would today if they ever actually get around to it. after their dual, Guts' sperm won because they 1)are Guts and 2) have a sword/tail to fight with... but during the fighting they rekindled the love/friendship that guts and griffith held during their good old days and combined to become a child.

What the unexpected result was that the aborted baby then melded with this newly forming fetus, thus creating the ugly baby. it wasn't evil or demonic, just had an aborted fetus that got thown onto its body. Seriously, if you had a fetus on your face/body you would look a little f'd up to. Since the G&G (guts and griffith) baby was born so early, it also retained the fetal appearance. however, when this fetus on fetus baby was eaten by the egg apostle, femto assumed the aborted child as his body, only appropriate, while G&G's child was transformed into a normal boy, just like ponochio, last seen on the beach.

Post by **Finito** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 4:40 pm

Guts is John Travolta back in shape, but totally retarded. Femto is Ashton Kutcher and Berserk turns out to be a punk'd show, everyone except Guts are in on the prank and they've been playing along. What seems to Travolta as human bodies being cut down is actually hitting his own oversized dick where all the fat went from is weight loss.

Post by **Skullkracker** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 4:42 pm

can I interest you in a brain Felony, or would you prefer a cracker?

Post by **MrFelony** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 5:54 pm

that was from over a year ago. almost 2 now. i think i;'ve found a brain since then lol

Post by **Istvan** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 11:54 pm

I can honestly say I'm in complete agreement with MrFelony on one thing, anyway. That theory definately doesn't make any sense at all.

Post by **MrFelony** » Thu Jan 25, 2007 1:09 am

I'll go back and find a post by insane noodle guy, he has some fucked up stupid theories too

Post by **Skullkracker** » Thu Jan 25, 2007 1:27 pm

no!
...
I mean...how about we wait for him to make a new one instead?

Post by **Istvan** » Thu Jan 25, 2007 11:38 pm

Insane noodle guy??? Who's that, I don't think I remember him. Is he still around?

Post by **MrFelony** » Fri Jan 26, 2007 6:13 am

he's an ooold school member, usually would just post in stupid theory thread. he's got that crazy stick figure guy as an avatar...i havent seen him for maybe a year?

[quote=InsaneNoodleGuy"]Chapter 280 is in fact the last chapter of berserk and the end of the story. It is currenty 500 pages long and counting. Release date is estimated to be early 2009[/quote]

lol he was close.

Post by **Istvan** » Fri Jan 26, 2007 11:50 pm

When did he post that?

Post by **Devil_Dante** » Sat Jan 27, 2007 12:31 am

MrFelony wrote:he's an ooold school member, usually would just post in stupid theory thread. he's got that crazy stick figure guy as an avatar...i havent seen him for maybe a year?

InsaneNoodleGuy" wrote:Chapter 280 is in fact the last chapter of berserk and the end of the story. It is currenty 500 pages long and counting. Release date is estimated to be early 2009

He probably got banned after saying such blasphemy lol

Post by **MrFelony** » Sat Jan 27, 2007 2:10 am

i think it may have been december...i dont know a long time ago

Post by **Istvan** » Sun Jan 28, 2007 12:13 am

Well, I'm certainly glad that we didn't have to wait 2 more years for chapter 280. Having to wait 4 months was bad enough. Over 2 years would have driven me insane.

Post by **Sandman** » Mon Jan 29, 2007 7:37 pm

2 years would have probably got me out of my berserken feening frenzy and back on the clean road, but I would still always have it in the back of my mind.

Anyway back to Theories

Now that the battle has truly begun all the human knights are seeing the apsostle army for the first time, but with Griffith's awesome powers he makes it so the apsotles look like angels. The only one that is not affected is Mule because he has already seen them for what they are...

Post by **Gemino** » Mon Jan 29, 2007 7:56 pm

It does appear that some apostles have the ability to completely mask their true forms like Grunberd and Locus. Zodd and the other minor apostles even in their human-like forms look like my mother-in-law in the morning.

I'm positive that one of the Human Knights of the Kushan called the Neo-Hawks Monsters but I will have to check back.

Evil Genius

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